Maybe it's a holiday, and you're trying to book flights.
Maybe you really want to go out but can't face actually leaving the house.
One day you're working at full strength and everything's easy, you're cruising through effortlessly.
The next you can't even decide what to have for dinner.
Sound familiar?
What happens when we compare ourselves to other people - to what they seem to be capable of...?
You're not lazy.
Your brain is simply overwhelmed and there's no spare space to juggle decisions. Some days you're fine, some days even the smallest thing is enough to overload the boat. Why?
One word: Overwhelm
Our brains can only keep a certain amount of variables in our conscious working memory. So if this space is already taken up, we run out of processing space to make decisions.
It's a system called Executive Function and it varies according to each person.
One thing you're NOT is lazy.
Why do I keep repeating this?
Because I hear clients saying this all the time. Wonderful compassionate human beings who seem to have it all together but are quietly breaking under the surface.
Super-motivated people who have read all the self-help books, done more courses, tried nutritional supplements, planners and still feel guilty and inadequate. MOTIVATED, empathic human beings.
YOU'RE NOT LAZY!
You've just overwhelmed your decision-making space.
So if trying to work out what to do is leaving you frozen read on.
And just in case you're short on time, I've made a decision spinner for you. Just click and spin and let it decide for you. Because the way through decision fatigue is just to make a decision - ANY decision - and then see how it feels. If it feels ok, go with it. If it doesn't, choose again.
The advantage of this is that it narrows down the options. Instead of ALL the possibilities, you're just choosing between two - yes this feels ok, or no this doesn't.
So twirl the spinner, flip a coin, choose a tarot card, whatever feels fun, and just do it:
Yes or no, and then HOW DOES THAT FEEL?
Maybe you really want to go out but can't face actually leaving the house.
One day you're working at full strength and everything's easy, you're cruising through effortlessly.
The next you can't even decide what to have for dinner.
Sound familiar?
What happens when we compare ourselves to other people - to what they seem to be capable of...?
You're not lazy.
Your brain is simply overwhelmed and there's no spare space to juggle decisions. Some days you're fine, some days even the smallest thing is enough to overload the boat. Why?
One word: Overwhelm
Our brains can only keep a certain amount of variables in our conscious working memory. So if this space is already taken up, we run out of processing space to make decisions.
It's a system called Executive Function and it varies according to each person.
- If you're ADHD you have less space for executive function because your superpowers of creative thinking are wired differently and for you everything has multiple variables.
- If your body is fighting off infection, you'll have less space for decision-making because your mind is focussing its efforts on healing.
- And if you're juggling three thousand important things for yourself and other people in the background, it all adds up and all of a sudden you'll find you won't have any spare space to make even small decisions like which socks to wear.
One thing you're NOT is lazy.
Why do I keep repeating this?
Because I hear clients saying this all the time. Wonderful compassionate human beings who seem to have it all together but are quietly breaking under the surface.
Super-motivated people who have read all the self-help books, done more courses, tried nutritional supplements, planners and still feel guilty and inadequate. MOTIVATED, empathic human beings.
YOU'RE NOT LAZY!
You've just overwhelmed your decision-making space.
So if trying to work out what to do is leaving you frozen read on.
And just in case you're short on time, I've made a decision spinner for you. Just click and spin and let it decide for you. Because the way through decision fatigue is just to make a decision - ANY decision - and then see how it feels. If it feels ok, go with it. If it doesn't, choose again.
The advantage of this is that it narrows down the options. Instead of ALL the possibilities, you're just choosing between two - yes this feels ok, or no this doesn't.
So twirl the spinner, flip a coin, choose a tarot card, whatever feels fun, and just do it:
Yes or no, and then HOW DOES THAT FEEL?
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The next thing we can do is free up brain space.
Think of your brain like a computer. How many tabs do you have open right now? Each one is taking up processing power, and if you have too many working in the background, you're going to grind to a halt. It won't matter if decisions are 'big' or 'small' you simply won't have enough operating power in your Executive Function to process anything more. If you're already operating at full capacity, it will only take one more small thing to overwhelm and freeze everything. Computer says no. |
Credit: Designalikie
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The solution here is to close some of your tabs.
Find a moment to sit down and do a brain dump. This is what we do every month in the Creative Healing Circle. We do it together every month so it actually gets done. But you can do it right now.
Just find a piece of paper and a pen, or open a new document.
Then write down or doodle EVERYTHING on your brain's to-do list right now. It doesn't matter how small or how big (they all take up the same decision-making space):
Laundry, feeding the cat, sorting out your underwear draw, your tax return, that project deadline, calling your friend, ALL OF IT.
Now you've made things visible, tangible. They're no longer abstract concepts to process, they're things on a list you can see and cross off, and give them beginnings and ends.
You don't have to remember it all any more because it's on a piece of paper or a digital screen you can go back to anytime. You can let go. It's safe to take all those subjects out of active working memory and dump them.
Have a look through your dump list and see if there are some patterns in the things that you've listed.
What's living rent-free? What's taking up space for longer than it should?
Are there particular things you always put off finishing?
Are you prioritising other people's need over your own?
Try rewriting your list into two columns:
That way it doesn't matter how much energy you have, you'll always be able to clear something out of your headspace and feel better.
Find a moment to sit down and do a brain dump. This is what we do every month in the Creative Healing Circle. We do it together every month so it actually gets done. But you can do it right now.
Just find a piece of paper and a pen, or open a new document.
Then write down or doodle EVERYTHING on your brain's to-do list right now. It doesn't matter how small or how big (they all take up the same decision-making space):
Laundry, feeding the cat, sorting out your underwear draw, your tax return, that project deadline, calling your friend, ALL OF IT.
Now you've made things visible, tangible. They're no longer abstract concepts to process, they're things on a list you can see and cross off, and give them beginnings and ends.
You don't have to remember it all any more because it's on a piece of paper or a digital screen you can go back to anytime. You can let go. It's safe to take all those subjects out of active working memory and dump them.
Have a look through your dump list and see if there are some patterns in the things that you've listed.
What's living rent-free? What's taking up space for longer than it should?
Are there particular things you always put off finishing?
Are you prioritising other people's need over your own?
Try rewriting your list into two columns:
- One for low-energy days (straightforward things that simply need doing)
- Another with all the items that need thinking about, will take ages or require more decisions. Save these for days when you have lots of energy.
That way it doesn't matter how much energy you have, you'll always be able to clear something out of your headspace and feel better.
Image: Designalikie
Feel supported: Join me for a gentle monthly practice for reconnecting with your creativity, inner wisdom and authentic voice. See the Creative Healing Circle HERE
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